The Blog

i should win best mom award for this


so last week at aprox 8:22 pm the night before the 2nd grade play (which my son was to be honey bee #2) i’m not kidding the kid comes up to me and says

second noise maker: “uh mom, i need a honey bee costume…for tomorrow’s play.”
okay keep in mind we live in a town of 500 people with NOTHING around us. i’m not joking when i say “middle of nowhere”. the only thing that might remotely have something that could help me in this predicament would be our “grocery store” that closes every night at 7. yup aprox 1 hour and 22 minutes ago.
me: panic setting in “W-what? what do you mean you need a honey bee costume?”
second noise maker who’s about to lose his life:” i’m a honey bee…and i need a costume. for the play. tomorrow.”
me: laughing uncontrollably “no, you’re kidding. did your dad make you say this?” not laughing anymore.
all eyes are now looking at the man i married who is silently laughing and trying really hard not to say anything. but can’t hold back anymore says:
“come on honey you’re crafty i’m sure you can whip something up.
by.tomorrow.morning. BAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!”
me: glaring “i don’t need your help.”
me back to the child who i gave birth to who is about to have it taken away by me as well: “uh, why didn’t you tell me before now?”
the child:“i don’t know? i didn’t really know till now.”
me: “likely story. go to bed. i’ll be over here trying to figure something out.”

and so i did. two wire hangers, hot glue, and some tights (which i kind of liked but had to sacrifice) created the wings.

and yeah okay so they look like i made them while smoking crack and drinking…but i wasn’t i swear.
a t-shirt turned inside out and some black masking tape was made into his “body”.
and you know what’s even better? a lot of the teachers at the school read my blog. so they know i sew and am capable of “crafty” things. so this post is for you teachers who were looking at my kid that day and thinking “what in the…i thought she was crafty.”

during the whole play all i could think was as i looked at the other honey bees “yup. that kid’s parent had more notice than me…so did that one. aaaaaand that one too.”

when i saw him afterwards (which he did a smashing good job at being honey bee #2 in-spite of my costume) i also saw his teacher and told her sorry about the costume we only had so and so many resources and blah de blah. you know what she said?
“well, we had extras we told him he could use but he wanted to wear yours.”

okay you can live a little longer honeybee.

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