The Blog

things my kids will probably tell their therapists in 25 years


picture from my archives: oldest son with a butterfly on his shirt in our front yard

well so yeah, i’ve been known to try to “fool” my children from time to time…like the time when i picked them up from school and kept driving past our house to two towns over to the local health center.
when they asked where we were going i told them “the health center.”
they then asked “do you have to go to the doctor?”
i answered “yes.”
it’s not my fault that they just left it at that…no follow up questions like ” why do you need to go to the doctor?” which then i would of had to answer “to get a flu shot” which then the next best follow up question would be ” do we have to get flu shots?” which then i would of had to answer truthfully “yes.” but they didn’t, so i didn’t tell them anything and as i was signing the papers to say yes give my children, and myself pain (which they then would give me a $5 gift certificate to the local food store for each flu shot we got).
the nurse calls out the kids names and they look at me like “what?…WHY?” but they didn’t SAY ANYTHING…so i just said “go on, follow the nurse.”
she looks at me quizzically and i mouth “they don’t know what’s coming” she mouths “OH.” and winks.
by the time i get to them in the room they’ve sort of figured out that something was not right…they had huddled together in the corner and they looked like cattle in a pen ready to be you know what…so i tell them we are ALL getting the flu shot as i stand in front of the door…just in case. my second boy (who is the most scared of the needle, and also happens to almost out wiegh me) starts whimpering and saying “i don’t want to! I DON’T WANT TO!”

the other children did pretty well, the 8 year old played it tough and didn’t even cry, the little one and the youngest of the boys cried a little but were fine when they got their sucker. now my middle boy was the last to go because he had wedged himself under the chairs and the wall…it took two nurses and me holding him down to finally get it in him. i felt kind of bad until i retrieved my $25 worth of gift certificates to the grocery store… where i bought them ice cream.

uh yeah or like two weeks ago when i didn’t change the hour for the time change so they went to bed one hour early and then i would, after they fell asleep, change it to the right time so they would go to school on time, and then i would change the clocks back again while they were at school, so they would go to bed early…yeah for a week.

i’m such stellar mom…and their therapists are going to have a field day with me! 🙂

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